Deborah's Past

6

London

The past month had witnessed an unexpected turn of events in Dawson murder case. Thomas Edwards, from the Anglican Church, strangely, decided to represent Deborah in the court. Deborah accepted it despite her being a catholic. 

Participation of a high ranking church official in a murder case, as advocate for the suspect ,increased the controversy surrounding the case. The Archbishop himself was under a heavy stress regarding his decision. Every time he thought on reversing the decision, he somehow opened the same page on the bible instructing him to go on.

The first day of the hearing was rather uneventful. 

The persecutor dominated the scene throughout the hearing. Thomas had picked up the wrong thread, He tried to prove that Deborah could not have had sex with his uncle, and the idea of her being involved in the murder was far fetched. It made a weak point, naturally.

The second argument that Thomas gave was that Deborah was at his friend Cicely’s home all the night. This was a considerably strong point, but lacked enough proof; as Cicely had traveled that night to her boyfriend's home after leaving Deborah.

By the end of the first hearing itself, both Deborah and Thomas saw darkness at the end of the tunnel. It had become a difficult case to tackle.

Thomas usually took the bus to Harrow after supper and discussed the case with Deborah. He usually stayed there longer to make notes and study the case in greater detail before taking the bus back.

As the case had become rather difficult to handle, he missed the supper and reached at Deborah’s place a little early.

Thomas asked Deborah as he sat in her living room, recording into his chip-set, the proceedings of the day:

  “Deborah, could you relate to me when, exactly, can you say, that your relations with your uncle were ‘not fine’? I remember you saying that your relations were good except a couple of minor episodes that are always there in all relations.”

“Reverend, why do you want to ask about this? You know these episodes are not worth remembering, especially for a deceased individual.” Deborah was mild in her words.

“Deborah, this has no longer remained Dawson murder case. The reputation of the church is at stake. This is the most talked about thing in Britain these days. I don’t know what the God wants, but the things are getting really complicated and you have to be as clear to me as possible.” Thomas explained.

“Reverend, do we really have to talk about this? It is a really uncomfortable topic.” Deborah said.

“Yes, I would insist.” Thomas replied.

Deborah started, “It was when I was fourteen years old, before I went to Portugal that..”

“Was your trip to Portugal an important turn of your life?” Thomas interrupted.

“It wasn’t a trip reverend. I stayed there for five years.” Deborah answered.

“Lisbon?” Thomas asked.

“Fatima, at Sanctuario de Fatima. Basilica de Nossa Senhora do Rosario.” Deborah said.

“You stayed at Fatima for five years and you didn’t tell me?” Thomas appeared annoyed.

“I thought you knew when you knew of other things.” Deborah replied.

 “This is amazing!” Thomas sounded a bit irritated. “Anyhow, continue with what you were saying.”

Deborah resumed, “After father died, I lived with uncle. Everything was fine. He was really caring. I cried sometimes, but now that I reflect on my past, I realize that he never actually let the void seem so big. With aunt it was a different story. I used to share my friends, my problems and my joys with her."

She continued, "One day, things changed. I was a young girl. Like all others, I was curious about the changes in my body. After bath I often used to watch myself in the mirror - my newly grown womanhood. I had left the room door unbolted by chance.” Deborah stopped. There was an uncomfortable silence in the room.

After some time Thomas cleared his throat and tried to break the silence. “Was it your uncle?”

Deborah answered, “It was my aunt.”

“Oh…” Thomas said. “Did it occur again?”

Deborah nodded. “Every day.”

“You felt guilty about it?”

“No.” Deborah answered. “I feel sorry for her.”

“One day, when we were in……uncle dropped in. 

The problems for my aunt stared from that day. The relationship between him and aunt deteriorated. He would not talk to her, neither to me. He would often rebuke her and shame her. Aunt started becoming more and more miserable day by day. She would cry alone. There was no doubt that she was a good wife. She loved uncle. I tried to approach her and talk to her, but all I could get from her was tears. She just stared at me whenever I went to her. All I could feel was hatred.

One day, I went to uncle, and I told him that he was wrong. He remained silent for sometime and then said – ‘I know little girl. The mistake is not yours.’ I burst in tears and hugged him. He patted my head.

After a few days, he told me that we are going to Portugal. We went to Lisbon and then took a cab to Fatima. He handed me over to Sister Clara at Fatima. This was to be my home for next five years and Sr. Clara, my mentor. Uncle mailed me often and talked to me. I never talked to my aunt, nor about her.

It was when I returned to Britain that I came to know that the relationship between both of them had become really turbulent. One day, she went to the riverbanks; or so goes the story – and committed suicide. She was never seen again.”

There was silence. It was broken again by her sighs and sobs – tears rolled down her cheeks. Thomas came around and held his hands gently.

“It’s alright Deborah. It’s ok. The god is with you.” He said.

He waited for her to stop. As she normalized, he spoke to her softly – “Don’t worry Deborah, lets pray to the god. He held her hands and closed his eyes. She followed Thomas. He spoke:

Our Father, who art in heaven.

She followed in Latin:

Pater noster, qui es in caelis:

Hallowed be thy Name.

sanctificetur Nomen Tuum;

Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, On earth as it is in heaven.

adveniat Regnum Tuum;

fiat voluntas Tua,

sicut in caelo, et in terra.

Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, As we forgive those who trespass against us.

Panem nostrum cotidianum da nobis hodie;

et dimitte nobis debita nostra,

sicut et nos dimittimus debitoribus nostris;

And lead us not into temptation, But deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever and ever.

    et ne nos inducas in tentationem;

    sed libera nos a Malo.

Amen.

Amen.

They opened their eyes. There was peace.